Tips for a Lasting and Loving Relationship

I will be perfectly honest here and tell you that up until a few years ago I would have been the worst person to give relationship advice, well that is unless you wanted to know how to ruin a relationship and end up single. I had that one down to a science. I can now happily say that after two very painful marriages and two horrible divorces plus a slightly rocky start to my current relationship (old relationships made me guarded) I can now say I have it at least somewhat figured out. I am happier than I’ve ever been and it’s all due to following these easy tips below. My relationship isn’t perfect by any means, but I am happy to say that it’s far from being on the verge of complete disaster and has so many more happy moments than it does slightly uncomfortable moments. That’s right I said slightly uncomfortable moments instead of bad. The reason I said that is because when you are truly in love and learn to respect each other there will be moments of weakness when you each don’t quite shine your brightest, but they are far from those horrible moments that I’m sure most of you have experienced at some point in your life. So now let’s get to those do’s and don’ts of a happy lasting relationship that is full of love.

Tips for a lasting and loving relationship.

  • Treat each other the way that you would want to be treated. That means let’s say for example, pretend you screwed something up on accident or forgot something because you were overwhelmed. How would you feel if your significant other yelled at you and put you down for it? Not very good I would assume so instead of yelling stop and think about how you would feel in their situation and be understanding and calmy discuss the situation. If they forgot something ask if they are overwhelmed and if they are then ask them if there is anything you could do to help. Never yell or belittle it never fixes anything.
  • Don’t make promises you don’t intend to keep!!! Doing so will cause loss of trust. If you must break a promise due to a legitimate reason then explain why you are breaking your promise and try to think of a way to make it up to them.
  • Treat them better than you do anyone else. If they notice you are treating a friend, other person of opposite sex, a parent etc. better than them it will cause resentment to grow. Your significant other should be your number one always. Right after Christ of course.
  • Always kiss hello and goodbye and tell each other you love them. You never know when the last time you will see someone will be so don’t miss that opportunity to express your love for each other, yes even when you are mad. Especially when you are mad. Just because you had a disagreement doesn’t mean you don’t still love each other.
  • Never give the silent treatment. Ok it’s perfectly fine to walk away and calm down before you come back together and discuss the issue at hand. Who knows once you calm down it may not actually be as bad as you originally thought. Overreact much? yeah I know I have before and honestly if I had taken a moment to calm down there wouldn’t have been a fight.
  • Be sure to always introduce your significant other to others rather it be family, friends, or colleague. When your significant other is important to you, you will want to show them the respect of making sure others in your presence know who they are.
  • Never go to bed angry….this right here y’all is one of the most important ones on the list. It is ok to still be upset when you go to bed but you should never go to bed with unresolved anger as it will only grow and fester and end up becoming an underlying issue that will eventually lead to resentment.
  • Never embarrass each other in public. Y’all this should be common sense. Do NOT ever do something to humiliate anyone you love especially your partner in life. Doing so will cause resentment and distrust to build and eventually end your relationship.
  • NEVER betray each other’s confidence. Anything that goes on between the two of you rather it be conversations or actions or anything that isn’t deserving of public knowledge should be kept between the two of you no matter what. breaking confidence is breaking trust.
  • Never ever begins sentence with the word you especially when you are angry. It is not ok to place the blame of any disagreement on the other person no matter whose fault it is. Be the bigger person and accept the responsibility for your part in the situation. You can’t control what the other person does but you can control your own actions.
  • Never disrespect each other
  • Always forgive….nobody said you ha to forget but forgive and move forward. Holding something over your lovers head will only push them away and grow hatred.
  • Don’t take each other for granted. Just because she always keeps the house clean or he always mows the yard don’t mean you should automatically expect it of them. Say thank you when they do these tasks and let them know how much you appreciate it as you never know when they may start to feel used and like everything they do goes unnoticed.
  • Never complain about them to others. I can not express how important this is. Just because someone pretends to be your friend doesn’t mean that they wont use your words against you and see the open door in your relationship. Hey if you aren’t happy with them and all you do is complain about them then why would you care if someone else takes them who will appreciate them.
  • Try to always remember birthdays and any other important dates.
  • Always be there for each other both physically and emotionally. If either person feels they are being neglected in either of these areas they may start to look for someone else to fulfill these needs.
  • Don’t forget it is ok to disagree so every disagreement shouldn’t be turned into a fight
  • Don’t be selfish
  • Make sure you put just as much or more energy into your relationship as you do everything else in your life. A good relationship requires lots of work and dedication
  • Think before you speak
  • Always be 100% transparent with your other half. Honesty and faithfulness go a long way.
  • Share responsibilities around the house as it’’s not always one persons job to do this or that.
  • Remember you are a team not opponents
  • Weekly date nights, monthly big dates such as a whole day spent together with no distractions, and at least try to go on weekend getaways at least once every 3 or months even if its just camping.
  • Be each other’s biggest cheerleader
  • Don’t raise your voice towards each other
  • Never argue or fight in front of others…. Save that for when you are alone however never fight in your bedroom as that is to remain a room of love and peace.

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